


Load Cycle (The Breaking Free Remix)

by zulu



Category: House M.D.
Genre: 07-04, M/M, Remix, for:bironic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-04-10
Updated: 2007-04-10
Packaged: 2017-10-02 01:04:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zulu/pseuds/zulu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes even House can't predict the steps of Wilson's dance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Load Cycle (The Breaking Free Remix)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Remix Redux. Remix of Breaking the Cycle, by Bironic. April 10, 2007.

**Load Cycle**

Midnight, and House waits  
for sleep, or for some chance break  
in the weather, or in the pain that dances  
outwards from his leg, or for the cycle  
of Vicodin and whiskey and puzzles to turn  
his focus away from his usual load

Of misery. His thoughts are live loads,  
chambered ideas in a mind that waits  
to fire when it will cause the worst damage, to turn  
whispers into promises that can only break.  
Today Wilson's eyes said he might leave Julie, or might not, the usual cycle,  
and sometimes even House can't predict the steps of Wilson's dance.

He's restless. House knows what he wants, and it's a different dance  
but one that comes with its own expectations, a load  
he might not be able to sustain. He's seen the cycle  
of Wilson's affections. He watches, diagnoses, waits,  
hiding his own heart carefully, where it won't break  
and Wilson can't reach it, or see it, or turn

Futility to bitterness. House has already lost too much. Everything turns  
on the axis of his pain, on the pills, on Stacy's dance  
out and in and out of his life. He needs the break  
that Wilson offers him, either to laugh or to load  
his anger on someone else's shoulders. He's still waiting  
for Wilson to leave, to shout Enough! To stop the cycle.

On nights like this he thinks of climbing on the cycle,  
revving the engine, roaring out to Wilson's place. He'll take his turn  
instead of sitting out and hoping Wilson will make a move, or waiting  
for Wilson to realize that his life with Julie is an empty dance.  
Everybody lies; when House stops he'll know the dice are loaded  
in his favour, and Wilson's only delaying to make a clean break.

He knows Wilson's knock, and when it comes it's sharp enough to break  
the silence between them. House shifts on his cane, cycles  
from hope to mockery, uses words so loaded  
that Wilson doesn't speak. He steps forward, and his eyes turn  
desperate and dark, and then he kisses House like a flame, dancing,  
like an answer to a question they've asked and left waiting

Too long. They've spent a decade waiting, afraid to break  
out of routines. Now they dance together, their desire cycling  
higher. They turn to each other at last, and they ease their needless loads.


End file.
